the /grace/ between
The grace poured out between.
On Remembering
Originally posted May, 2026 on Substack I went to visit an old friend the other day. (A whirlwind one day trip to DC). The older I get, the less I like visiting gravesites. It used to bring me comfort, to stand at my grandparents gravesite, to feel connected to people...
The Body Keeps The Score
*Originally posted April, 2026 on Substack. Reposting here for posterity. They say the body keeps the score. Tally marks through your flesh and blood and bone. Carved into your memories as suffocating panic and wrenching grief. It is a violent game. // On Feb 28,...
The Grief of PTSD
*Originally posted to Substack in August of 2025. Posting here to keep a record on a platform I control. My husband has PTSD. He received the diagnosis at the beginning of 2019 although the signs were a long time coming. At first we kept it to ourselves - he asked me...
On Keeping Them Safe
(Trigger warning: Brief mention of suicide and self harm.) When I turned forty, I thought I said goodbye to a decade of being tired. Chuckbob wasn’t even a thought. COVID was months away. // I remember when my Second Son was just weeks old, and I was a fresh mom of...
On Connection and SEC Football
I promised myself connection these days but it’s been a hard two years of minimizing dysfunction and wild grief and depression and parenting hard things and pretending it’s all good in the moment. I went to a women’s fellowship for our church last night. I prayed...
On the Physical Nature of Grief
So here’s my new semi-terrible discovery. There is a nonlinear expression in the physical nature of grief, not just the intellectual and emotional, and nearing the anniversary of my daddy’s death, the two are not working in concert. Not at all. My body has functioned...
Poured Out Like Water
2021 feels like a lament, a sacrifice, a burnt offering of time and sanity and presence. A series of goodbyes, both to the tangible and to the what-could-have-been. I haven’t been much of a friend. Or a mother, or a wife, or even a writer. I am stretched between them...
The Five Stages of Grief
No matter what there is to say about grief, it's already been said. Still, this is new for us, so I am going to repeat them all. The Five Stages of Grief denial anger bargaining depression acceptance Denial The first week after dad died, I was mostly numb, definitely...